Wednesday, March 7, 2007

My Best Worst Date Ever

There are times in our lives when we all just have to sit back and say, "I cannot believe that just happend to me." Or, in my case, as my friend Gina would say, "Well, there's another one for your book." It has gotten to where I tell a dating horror story and those who know me well will agree that it could only happen to me. That's why my worlds greatest worst dating story is no big deal for me.

Many singles in my situation (living in a small town, have a busy schedule- this was when I was on the show 6 nights a week) often rely on the internet to meet people. Now, after having done this I would not recommend it at all! But, nontheless... I met this guy online. He was pretty cute in his pictures. Met all my physical requirements, in fact, he was even 6'4" like I wanted. We exchanged emails for a while and finally one day he told me that he had to admit something to me. "Oh, great," I thought. "This is where he tells me that he's been in jail or has 14 kids or is really a woman." He wouldn't come right out and tell me, he only gave me clues. It was very European, he said. Hmm... Having never been to Europe but seeing it in the movies I wondered if he drank beer like it was water or something. Then he tells me that there was a Seinfeld episode about it. Now, I have never watched an entire episode of Seinfeld. I know, I know. How can a pop culture freak like myself never watch Seinfeld? But I digress... Even my Seinfeldaholic friend Gina couldn't figure out what he could possibly be talking about.

Well, come to find out, he tells me that he is a nudist. Now, not the kind that one that wants to live in a nudist colony or anything, but when he's at home alone he likes to be in the buff. At the time, I was like, you know, no big deal. Just keep your britches on around me and we'll be fine. So we agree to meet and he comes to my house (my roommate was upstairs so chill out... I wasn't alone with him!). During the course of our conversation he asks, "Do you mind if I get comfortable?" Sure, I thought. Kick off your shoes. But I turn my head and he is reaching for his belt. "What are you doing?" I ask, panic stricken. "I'm getting comfortable," he replies, undoing his belt. "No you're not!" I yelled. "Not on my couch you're not!" He says, "But you said I could get comfortable..."

Needless to say, the gentleman left and I never heard from him again. But I think I can honestly say I have one of the best worst date stories ever, don't you agree?